PMS LEAVE FOR EMPLOYEES

What could possibly improve morale at your office more than offering PMSing women 2-3 days of paid leave a month? Turn the most dreadful days of their lives (and yours) into a break that they (and you) can look forward to. Don't waste money on frivolous fringe benefits like awkward monthly catch-all birthday parties - answer the real needs of your employees! You'll have the most loyal female workforce since Rosie the Riveter!

PMS VACATIONS FOR WIVES

What could possibly improve your marriage more than offering your wife 2-3 days of spa vacationing each month? Turn the most dreadful days of her life (and yours) into a break that she (and you) can look forward to. Forget dumb gifts like roses and sappy Hallmark cards — when her hormones are raging, she won't accept your most heartfelt pandering. So pay someone else to dress up in white, fetch her stuff, and suffer her abuse. Talk about win-win!