During the same exact time the President was wowing the faithful, the first (and as it turns out, the biggest) riot was taking place right outside the Staples Center. Apparently some idiot okayed everyone's favorite corporate anti-corporate rock band, Rage Against The Machine, to give a free concert in the designated "protest area" right outside the arena. The might as well have dialed up Riots-To-Go. I mean, what were they THINKING?!?

By the time everyone else started exiting the Convention Hall the cops had already come down on the rioters like a ton of bricks, which brought out a mixture of guilt AND relief from the evening gown-wearing delegates, many of whom are former protesters themselves, i.e.: "This is an outrageous abuse of Free Speech — yet Thank God I can now walk safely back to my hotel!"

We still had to wait a good half hour before the coppers let us out of this... PEN they constructed for our safety, though. All of a sudden my formerly trusty suit and tie had become a LIABILITY.