THE STRAIGHT STORY

Dear Polly,

In belated honor of truth day, I am overcoming my normal star struck awe of people of marginal fame to write and ask a few questions.

1. Have you been working out? I notice that your cartoon avatar has a slimmer waist, perkier breasts, and an ass of steel. Is this indicative of reality, or is Terry just trying to get in your pants again?

2. If Terry does have a crush, could you forward a request that he post his fantasy nude doodles of you to alt.binaries.pictures.erotica.cartoons for me?

3. If it is the truth that you've been working out and look like Janeane Garofalo — Herve Villechaize, could you maybe get Terry to do a proper Before and After spread of your struggle towards aspirations of putting Christina Aguilera in her bulimic place?

Thanks.

p.s. I really like the new hairdo. The strategic loose strand on the front of your nouveau pompadour really turns me on! :) If I had a womb, I'd carry your love child.

Saint Waldo <stwaldo@teleport.com>

Next...All that Chazz!