After having several interview requests with my home state representative Miss Washington ignored (that prissy little pug-nosed brat!), I told the fussy matrons that I'd interview anyone, "even Miss Delaware." This scored me a lot of points with the fussies, since contestants from the smaller northern states in particular have very little press following them around, and they tend to feel neglected as a result (though Miss Delaware ignored my interview requests as well, that stuck-up little so 'n' so!).

Miss Michigan, Che'vonne Burton, was exactly what I expected: been entering pageants since she was 12; wants to be an actress; "simply THRILLED to be here" and so on. She's only 18 though, and the youngest of all the contestants by far, so for that reason alone I cut her some slack... The most amazing thing about her is that she's a black girl from Detroit CITY ("NOT the sissy suburbs"), yet she had no "street" in her accent at all. She talks and acts like Audrey Hepburn! But then, that place was crawling with Eliza Doolittles...

Speaking of Audreys: Miss Alaska, Audrey Solomon, was a surprise. She plays, studies and teaches classical violin, and is here mainly for the much needed scholarship dough — "as well as to promote the cause of bringing music and art programs back to public schools," she quicky added. As worthy a cause as any, no doubt, but she still seemed a little uncomfortable being there...

The same went for Miss North Dakota, Carrie Haberstroh. She's attending Harvard, but her folks are poor, and her athletic scholarship is just a drop in the bucket tuition-wise. So figuring she had nothing to lose and a few bucks to gain, she entered her home state's pageant contest and won. No one was more surprised than she was: "I'm really not a 'pageant girl' at all," she insisted, and I believed her, since she obviously was slightly embarrassed by all this Miss North Dakota jazz. She was getting a kick out of it at the same time, though: "I'm having fun, and the other girls are cool... it's all been worth it."

They never put down the competition, nor did they ever forget to give The Miss America Organization the thumbs up, in spite of my best efforts to get them to make fun of it. Smart girls! Smarter than ME, anyway...