Enter Ron and Kyla, who along with the owner of a nearby music club called "The Tractor" bought Hattie's in '96. Ron and Kyla publish the music magazine NO DEPRESSION, which celebrates country and rockabilly musical styles of the '50s in particular. Their taste for all things post-war "retro" extended to dives like Hattie's as well, so when they heard it was up for sale they dived right in, with the intention of not changing a goshdarned thing about everyone's favorite hellhole.

Ahh, if only life were that simple. For one thing, as funny as a raging drunk might be IN THEORY, the laughs die quick when one of them is punching your best customers in their respective kissers for no apparent reason. So before you knew it, there was a WHOLE LOTTA 86-in' goin' on. Then Hattie's long time "cook" cracked under the pressure of suddenly being expected to serve edible food, and took her talent for burning cheap ground beef elsewhere. Hey, those burgers used to cost only $2.35 for a reason!