Governor Oliver Stone (Democrat - Hawaii). In 2001, Stone moved his filmmaking compound to Puga-Puga, an island he purchased with the proceeds from his subtle hit flick The Vietnam War: It Really Bit, and, as had been rumored, began pressing palms. In addition to legalizing homosexual union, Stone had legalized everything. From atop his Kurtz-like palace, while feasting on various hogs and virgins, Stone announced his presidential bid for 2004 before sinking into a coma. It was said that the first order of business would have been to re-open the files about the assassination of Lady Diana, the subject of his 23rd film, Oh My God, They Killed Diana! You bastards!


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