for 21 June 2000. Updated every WEEKDAY.
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Filler
hi polly, just want to say that your articles have incredible undeniably accurate insight into my inner psyche. how do you do it? somehow you make people like myself feel very small and insecure if not psychologically paranoid. sam lie <sam_lie@hotmail.com> Well, it's all a part of my malevolent nature, I guess. But there is a big picture, Sam. Don't think for a second that there aren't some guiding principles behind this machine. World domination is impossible without a significant dose of smallness and insecurity, if not outright paranoia, spreading like a nasty head cold among the teaming masses. Your inner psyche is really crumbling, by the way. I'd suggest an inner psychic makeover. Either that or consider building a bigger wall between your conscious mind and your innermost, subconscious thoughts. That's right: Denial is your friend. You think the truth will set you free? You're too weak for the truth, Sam. As Jack said to Larry Bird the other night post-defeat: You want the truth? You can't handle the truth! Don't tear down the wall - build the wall. Build it! Think: the more comfortably numb, the better. Evil veteranarian, Polly  Having just been through a "the magic is gone" type breakup, the latest Filler really spoke to me. As much as people (seem to) complain about Filler being meaningless, I think you've really captured the feeling of our time. It *is* true that people these days feel like they have to stay single through their 20s because they have to meet that perfect person, and it's also sad that people seem to think that a relationship is over the minute they get the hots for someone else. I think you're right. There is something very wrong with all of us. We're one fucked-up generation :) Chris Druckenmiller <cdrucken@DigitalRiver.com> Hey, at least we can admit that we're fucked up, right? Or at least, it gives us some perverse sort of relief from our own unrealistically high expectations of ourselves that we admit what's wrong with us, right? Wow, that's really sad, that babbling about how fucked up we are makes us feel better. We really are fucked up. It's not funny, man! We're fucked! Mmm. I feel so much better now. Anyway, screw "magic." You're going out with someone and you get a crush on someone else? Stay with your current flame, trust me. It's like this character Crawford used to say on these public service announcements on TV in North Carolina when I was a kid: "Yew onleh wont the toy becawse yew sow eeyut own TayVay." We want that which is just out of reach, but in our faces, looking tasty and smelling nice. Once you start hanging out with the new person, you start to realize he/she's got a whole new showcase showdown of lame traits that are just as annoying as the last one. New boss, same as the old boss, whatever. It pays to give the person you're with a shot, magic or no, before you sell it all up the river for a toy you only want because you saw it on TV. Unless the toy you have now is just an utter piece of shit, in which case, dump away. Boring the living crap out of myself, Polly Dear Polly, I recognize so many of your characters. I grew a goatee and suddenly everybody else was growing them, too. I bought these Converse high tops, and later that day everybody had them on. Are we herd animals, or what? The funny thing is, I always feel so special and unique. It is always surprising and comic to find out I am plugged into the same zeitgeist as everybody else, following when I think I'm leading. But then I think: if something is no longer cool once everybody's doing it, then what is cool, really? If your theme was that sincerity and emotional honesty are underrated, then I got it. Loyalty is somewhat underbought these days, too, I'd add. One of the most subtle Fillers lately, I enjoyed it even more the second time I read it. I recognized and related to many of the contrasts you drew, and the dialogue between "you" and Joey at the end tied it together quite nicely. Yours, Trendy Without a Cause Too bad I blew it all with today's totally unsubtle load of shit. God I hate today's Filler. I mean, the first cartoon, fine. But the rest? Fucking wankfest. Hate it. It's so painful to write something you don't like in retrospect. Writing jokes when you're high from too much coffee is like tape recording yourself when you're drunk. The only thing I can think of that must be worse is being on the Real World at age 20 and blabbering about yourself to a national audience before you even know who you are or what you want. MTV is committing a pretty terrible crime, if you think about it. And I want to thank them for making such a terrible trainwreck of so many lives for my idle amusement. Not afraid to take a quick look at myself and whine loudly about what I see, Polly The Friends of Eddie Murphy Your article reminds me of a thing Hilton Als wrote in the New Yorker a while back, wherein he claimed that Eddie Murphy, Chris Rock , Martin Lawrence and Eddie Griffin (the buffoonish guy from Malcolm and Eddie, yeah, I forgot who he was, too) were all knockoffs of Richard Pryor. You and Hilton should get together and fight. Bye Bye, Darin H. Strret Fightin' Man <Zoner39847@aol.com> Darin, thanks for writing. I'll fight anyone named "Hilton" anytime, anywhere. Except Lawrence Hilton-Jacobs. — 40SB (Tom Spurgeon) Sandy Hunter wrote: Hey..cool piece on Murphy-clones, but don't you think Chris Tucker's work in the Ice Cube weed flick Friday was worthy of note? sandy hunter staff writer 'boards magazine www.boardsmag.com <shunter@brunico.com> Hi, Sandy: I liked Chris Tucker much more in Friday — and the other early film he did (Dead Presidents?) — than any of the work that's followed. Of course, it's the success of that work that priced Tucker right out of the Friday sequel. — 40SB Black, Excellent - one of the most engaging articles I've seen at Suck in quite a while - probably because I agree with almost everything you said. A few nitpicks: * Dave Chappelle owes as much to Cheech & Chong as he does to Eddie Murphy. * I think you missed the point on both The Fifth Element and Martin Lawrence's comedy - sometimes it's not about character, or plot, or quality performances - sometimes its about the glory of pure, pressurized, ultra-refined baroque bullshit. * While Bruce Lee clones are not as cool as Bruce Lee himself, the Eddie Murphy clones named here are generally funny as hell, often funnier than Eddie himself. And didn't people used to say that Eddie was a clone of Richard Pryor? Why wasn't he at the Richard Pryor award ceremony? That schmuck Robin Williams was. Someone should get that dude back on coke. Yrs, Colin <crankine@sensenet.com> Thanks for writing, Colin. I agree with you David Chappelle has a wider variety of influences — so does Lawrence, for that matter. Although I disagree that all of the comedians and actors mentioned in the article are funny, I'll grant you any one of them is funnier than Bruce Li is compelling. But I think it's too bad across the board that they play those Murphy-style roles. I really haven't seen any of them out-Murphy Murphy, in other words. Speaking of Bruce Li, remember Jackie Chan went through a period of being the new Bruce Lee, too. Regardless of your opinion of Chan's comedy films, you have to admit they're way better than the Lee-style movies. I'm glad you enjoyed the piece. — 40SB First of all, very well done. I'm an avid suck reader and have never taken the time to write an author, but today's essay got me thinking. I agree with you almost 100% but there is 1 thing I really would have liked to see in your essay, and if you have time, what your opinion might be... The fate of the 80's contemporary, Murphy sidekick, and I would say failed clone: Arsenio Hall. He played multiple roles right along side Murphy in "Coming to America" and clearly with less skill. He never quite made it to feature film and his talk show was made fun of in every venue. How did this guy get famous? But what's even more interesting is his stint on CBS as sidekick to Sammo Hung. Now we've got clone of a clone with the TV show immitating Rush Hour, imitating 48 Hours? If you have a chance, I'd be curious to hear... Thanks, Chris Robert <cjay@ragingbull.com> P.S. Why don't we see more stuff from you? You got some good insight... Hi, Chris: I didn't include Arsenio Hall because he — and maybe I'm blocking this out because the memory is too painful — didn't go on to carry his own movies. If Coming to America were made right now, the Hall role would likely be played by Martin Lawrence, I'm guessing. I agree with your analysis of Hall's performance. You're also right that Arsenio playing on Sammo Hung's show makes him in some ways a kind of clone of a clone, which is truly frightening. CBS didn't even seem to hide the fact much when casting Hall. Although... from the only episode of the show I've seen Hall seemed less like a Murphy-type partner than one of those humilating sidekicks on the Sam Raimi action shows, there to give the star someone to interact with between fight scenes and look less impressive than while they're going on. Incidentally, some feel that Rush Hour was a lot like the it-was-big-in-Russia movie I describe in the essay, Drive. Which would give Arsenio two clone bloodlines. Anyway, thanks for the kind words and I hope to be writing for Suck more often in the near future. — 40SB Angry, versatile, foul-mouthed, boundary-pushing black performer with enough talent to crossover to the melanin-deficient mainstream, made a big splash with his concert work and went on to movie blandness: Richard Pryor. Angry, versatile, foul-mouthed, boundary-pushing black performer with enough talent to crossover to the melanin-deficient mainstream, made a big splash with his concert work and went on to movie success: Eddie Murphy. As you said, "What separates star cloning from such common occurrences as young hopefuls assuming an older actor's outward ticks or public persona mantle-passing is intent." But to know that, we'd have to peer into Lorne Michaels' brain (eeeeeeeew!). Murphy was clearly a Pryor clone to begin with. The reason that Murphy has the influence to launch half a dozen spores of his own is that sadly, even before his tragic illness, Pryor's story didn't have a second act. I could argue that Pryor was, in turn, a Flip Wilson clone but you can push this thing only so far. Pretty fly for a Canadian guy, Michael K 7lt;michael.k@iname.com> I bet looking into the mind of Lorne Michaels would be like that one big scene in Being John Malkovich where Malkovich looks into his own head, except that there'd be a few Paul Simons and a couple of Chevy Chases amidst all the Lornes. I think at most you can define Murphy's early popularity as a reflection of Pryor — he's clearly the biggest influence on his stand-up, although I see a lot of Redd Foxx (the way he uses profanity) and Bill Cosby (that Mom/shoe routine) in the early Murphy material, too. But Murphy always lacked that sense of vulnerability that made a lot of what Pryor did in stand-up great, and informed a lot of Pryor's film work. It's weird, but I think Murphy could have played Bill Cosby's TV and film roles more easily than just about any of Pryor's. Thanks, Michael. — 40SB Yngwie Malmsteen: now there's a name I haven't heard since high school. I guess he got surgery for his carpel tunnel, as he's obviously still playing violin, er, guitar. Who else would think of taking spirited, lyrical riffs from Paginini and putting them in the somber, heavy-metal version of Wagnerian opera? Rob Peneguy <peneguy@tryc4.com> It's a brave artist who mixes and matches with that kind of daring. I don't think the world's quite ready to come to terms with the massive debt all arts owe Malmsteen. Thanks, — 40SB Your work is a treasure. This is your best since that tax revolt piece. Have you considered a collection of essays ,a la George Will or WFB? I'd buy ten! Thanks for doing that voodoo, that you do, sooooo well. Steven P. Sanabria <diegodeigh@pikeonline.net> Steven: I'm not as interested in doing their kind of essay books as I am in writing gimme essays on baseball and smoking pot on a sailboat. Thanks for the encouragement. — 40SB (Tom Spurgeon) |
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