for 12 July 2000. Updated every WEEKDAY.
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Filler
Polly, You are one rocking lady. You've pinned down my hypocritical urban hipsterness perfectly. This doesn't mean I have to change, does it? I can't conceive of a rewarding life that isn't iced with a healthy layer of disdain and a creamy elitist filling. Heply yours, Liam Don't worry, change will come naturally. That creamy elitism will give you a stomach ache eventually. Or you'll transform into a creamy elitist. I don't fucking know. Mostly you'll just get sick of weird shoes that give you blisters, and you'll stop styling your hair because it takes too long, and you'll start reading your wife's copy of Newsweek. Once you're in couples therapy, it's pretty much all over. Be not afraid. It's much better on the other side. Disdain for the disdainful, Polly  hey hey HEY. alright, people, that's enough. let's leave polly alone, ok? not that she can't take care of herself or anything, but the insult-inside-a-story responses just ain't right, you know? i mean, jeez, why can't you just be nice? why can't you just read the suck and say, "oh, okay," and go on to change your cat's litter or have a sixth cup of coffee like the rest of us? why must you beat upon polly so? it's just not nice. no kool-aid and cookies for the suck readers this afternoon. and no, you certainly may NOT be the naptime fairy. bitch. have a ginger snap, polly, emmers Wow, suddenly I feel like I have an older sister who could actually beat up someone else's older sister, and might even do so upon request, as opposed to saying, "I'm not gonna fight your stupid fights for you, you stupid little brat!" But maybe it would be more peaceful to point out that many disgruntled readers should consider getting a cat or drinking more coffee - anything to improve their crabby moods. Then again, attacking me seems to provide them with some form of catharsis, don't you think? Doing my part to ease their pain, Polly Goddamn that was therapeutic. Hey Polly, can you focus on scripting vengeful conversations from now on that my divalicious queerboy crowd and me can emulate? Have you and Terry considered syndicating your stuff in something like the Bay Times, so we'd have someone to watch out for 'sides Dykes and Ethan Green? (They'd fawn over you worse than me, and they'd give better hair advice.) Have you considered moving to Seattle to become a motivational speaker? We have taquerias up here, too. yr loyal tattooed housebitch, Andrew You know, I'm in Seattle as I write this, and you people really do need some motivation around here. I mean, no one seems to be motivated enough to dress like self-conscious coolios like they do everywhere else, or at least in San Francisco, LA, and New York. I mean, you people seem relaxed, like you're living your own lives without a thought to what anyone else thinks about it. And you've got trees and shit everywhere. You must be stopped! Divalicious queerboys or not, we can't have you running around all happy and relaxed! It's not fair to the smog-sucking, fog-mucking, dog-fucking rest of us! Unhinged, Polly Subject: Perals of wisdom Dear Polly, You crack me up, most of the time, and believe it or not 'Filler' makes me feel better about myself, and the pettiness that has become a part of our daily lives in this dot.com/Gen X world. So what if I am still stuck in the same monotonous |
![[Tim Cavanaugh]](/fish/staff/images/tim.gif)
![[Phillip Bailey]](/fish/staff/images/phil.gif){kind=small}
