for 27 October 2000. Updated every WEEKDAY.

Tim Cavanaugh
Special Guest Editor

Terry Colon
Art Director

Heather Havrilesky
Senior Editor

Joey Anuff
Publisher

Fuckin' Great. I have always loathed Altman, especially after being forced to watch "Nashville" as part of an Appalachian studies class. Your dissection of the outsider label was one of the best things I've read in months. When I am an Insider, I will proudly proclaim that fact before God and man, and use it every possible way to push my agenda of freedom and liberty.. and maybe licentiousness as well.

Dale Fitz
<daledoe@bnoc.net>

Let me first commend you on your fine, discriminating taste, which seems to have survived at least a psychic trip to Appalachia. I felt the same way after seeing McCabe & Mrs. Miller as part of a mandatory Warren Beatty studies class at the kollege me attended.

Good luck on being an insider. We'll look for you in the celebrity Q&A in the free weekly TV guide that comes in the Sunday paper we steal off our neighbor's porch.

Mr. M

Yes! Yes! Yes!

Finally, someone has pointed out the impossibly unnoticed lunacy of GWB calling himself an "outsider". I mean, for Christ's sakes, George W, your Dad was el prez, you're a state governor, and so is your brother. You make the Kennedy family look like awkward freshmen.

Only in America would people actually swallow that bunk. Well, not entirely. In Canada we've just recently elected a new opposition leader (Stockwell Day) who's trying to position himself as "The Outsider" but, in my opinion, is looking more like a fundamentalist bumpkin from the small town prairies.

Thanks for calling some bullshit what it is.

Rob Tarzwell
<doctorbob@attcanada.ca>

The Kennedys, I rush to point out, are true outsiders. For instance, Bobby Kennedy, long before he walked over that hill with Abraham, Martin, and John, was senator from New York, a state in which he reportedly never stepped foot.

Mr. M

"Franklin Pierce, best known then as a northern supporter of slavery and now as the source for Hawkeye's name in M*A*S*H)," I believe Hawkeye comes from a James Fenimore Cooper book, maybe Last of the Mohicans. He was a northern writer, Coopersburg NY to be exact.

Scoats
<scoats@greylodge.com>

"Hawkeye" did indeed come from Last of the Monoxidils, by Cooper. Howebber, Alan Alda's character was named "Benjamin Franklin Pierce" and hailed from the grate state of Maine — home of Bowdoin College, whereat Nat Hawthorne and Franklin Pierce become buds (Hawthorne even wrote a pathetic campaign bio of the latter; well worth checking out as it has more lpp [laffs per page] than Young Goodman Brown and House of the Seven Gables put together).

Mr. M

Subject: stay gold, pony boy.

Mr.Mxyzptlk,

This is the writing I read suck for. The blatant hypocrisy that no one seems to remark on, yet is right there in everyone's face. How sad that the only thing most of the people you referred to in your article were truly outside of was the experience of "common" people. Anyhow, I'm really pissed at the sons (and daughters) of privilege describing themselves (or being described as) outsiders. So what I'm saying is...excellent article!

your pal mal
<aztec_mummy@centropolis.org>

Dear le petit mal,

I'm beside myself with joy and, if I wasn't so "in" that I couldn't be bothered to show such feelings of vindication. I just might. But please don't contact me again. I'm off the Sheen family detox ranch in Malibu and can't be bothered.

Mr. M

Thanks for your column on the phrase "old school". Although I don't really watch much tv or listen to radio or really participate too much in any form of media consumption, I have noticed this stupid phrase infect the language of even those near and dear to me.

As you rightly point out, the phrase "old school" attempts to legitimate a given phenomenon by pointing out its ancient origins, much like various Buddhist teachers have had to prove themselves by tracing their discipleship back to the original dude, Shakyamuni.

I hate this kind of crap. It takes so much energy to resist smacking someone when they misuse an overused phrase like "deconstruction" and "paradigm shift". It pains me, because these words used to point to ideas, but now they are just Words That Are Supposed To Make You Sound Smart (but actually make you sound dumb as shit.)

But, dude, lay off WBCN. BCN totally rocks, dude. They are even older than old school. I bet even now they are still playing "Dream On" by Aerosmith (*the* bad boys from Boston) as part of their heavy rotation.

Dude, morning dj Charles Lacquadera even gave me a wake up call on my 15th birthday. It was awesome.

BCN will always be wicked, wicked pissah.

Your pal,

Roadrunner Krazykatovitch
<roadrunner@waste.org>

Our humblest apologies, Roadrunner. As usual, dyslexia is to blame. We were thinking that it was WNBC that was keepin' it Old School. WBCN we've never heard of.

Then again, we're pretty sure The House Imus Built has played "Dream On" once or twice, too.

Sucksters

As usual, a lovely column/piece today. And no, I'm not being sarcastic.

One problem: What the hell is an "E-Z Pass" World Series? Is this what they're calling it on the West coast? Cause I have yet to hear any idiotic NYC newscaster, sportscaster, or annoying tabloid newspaper refer the upcoming "Subway" Series as the "E-Z Pass" Series.

Not only is E-Z Pass not catchy (and don't get me started on the whole "E-Z" issue — ugh!), but it lacks a certain alliterative quality. Subway Series however is quite catchy, and lends itself nicely to local news and newspapers developing inane graphics using the signs from the MTA, MetroCards, tokens, anything else they can get their grubby little hands on.

Of course us NY-area folks now have to put up with all the crap and hype surrounding the series. Oh yay.

Keep on Suckin',

Jen Bonnell
<JBonnell@penguinputnam.com>

Not surprisingly, we heard the term "E-Z Pass Series" on local sports radio. Unfortunately, we are unable to find an original citation. Most likely, the first use of this term was by one of the drooling minions of the incomparable WFAN in Queens. We have since heard that even the Times made reference to the phrase a few weeks ago. However, we may also have picked this up from one of the lonely souls looking for phone friendship at Trenton's WKXW. In any event, we think the term has some usefulness in suggesting which fans can actually afford to attend the games. At the very least, we doubt that Denzell, Regis, and the many other cap-wearing celebs Fox has been cutting to in the stands every two seconds took the Number 4 to the game.

Sucksters

Was intrigued to note a link to one of our film reviews by Joel Siegel (https://www.thesuck.net/daily/2000/10/20/).

Not sure how or why you found it, but we appreciate the hepness by association.

Dave Nuttycombe
<webmeister@washcp.com>

Back atcha, Dave. In this case, we're pretty sure the writer was so amazed to find a Joel Siegel review that wasn't a slobbering rave that he wanted to commemorate the occasion.

Yr Pal,

Tim

The Shit

Krushchev Remembers, by Nikita Krushchev (authorship disputed), translated by Strobe Talbott

Five-Star Day Cafe Athens, Ga.

Salon's "Action Figures" TV ad

Donna's Famous "Long and Short of It," by Donna Anderson and friends

Two-Lane Blacktop, directed by Monte Hellman (The Anchor Bay/Universal letterboxed edition)

George Bush, Dark Prince of Love: A Presidential Romance, by Lydia Millet (Scribner)

King Kong: The Complete 1933 Film Score, by Max Steiner Moscow Symphony Orchestra, William J. Stromberg conductor (Marco Polo)

Eightball #20, by Dan Clowes (Fantagraphics Books)

The ECW's Little Spike Dudley

Stan Kenton, City of Glass, featuring arrangements by legendary weirdo Bob Graettinger (EMD/Blue Note)

Comix 2000, Edited and published by L'Association, 2000

Star Dudes

Do you know of stuff that doesn't actively suck? Things so good they deserve to make the Shitlist? Send your suggestions to us.